As long as we're together it doesn't matter
by DancingQueensStories
Summary: This is Julia's point of view of when William comes home and begs her not to leave him.


Here's another Jilliam fanfic! Enjoy!

….

(Murdoch Suite)

 _I was just finishing writing the "goodbye" letter to William and putting it in the envelope. As I put the letter aside, and I look over the brochures I got from the agency and looked at some places I would like to see in London, Italy and Paris. But there are all romantic places William and I always planned to go too._

 _As I am looking at them, I look over at the chair where the Inspector had sat down yesterday with a scotch in his hand, and I remember word's I had said to him. "I had a life before William Murdoch, I can have one again."_

 _Truth be told, I don't want a life without William Murdoch, despite our differences, I am still head over heels in love with him. From the moment I looked at him with those big beautiful brown eyes, I was in love, but he is too mad and doesn't love me anymore. I lost our little Mary and he lost his chances at being a father. He hates me for what I encouraged Rebecca to do, which was inexcusable in his eyes. But this separation I believe is for the best._

 _As I continue looking at the brochures I hear the door open and close, I look up and I see William._

 _He looks at me and says_ "hello"

 _I look at him for a second and say_ "hello, William" _and place the brochures in my travel folder._

 _He comes closer but very slowly and looks at the couch and sees my bags all packed._

"You're leaving?" _he asks me_

 _I just stare at him with no answer._

"I don't know quite what to say, but if you want to leave, that's certainly your right."

 _I just look at him with an annoyed voice and say_ "you don't need to tell me that."

 _But in my mind I was thinking of course I can leave, you have no control over me and well William, you're a pushover._

"I was hurt"

 _I corrected him_ "we were both hurt. But what I did was inexcusable in your eyes, at least. It's possible we'll never find common ground."

"I know, but it doesn't matter. We are not the same, Julia."

 _That is true; we are definitely not the same person. He has his beliefs, and I have mine, but can our marriage survive these beliefs?_

"We've been different everyday of our marriage. But I count every single one of those days…"

 _As he is saying this I just stare at him with a serious look._

"as the happiest in my life"

"and that's enough?"

 _He looks at me_ "I think so"

"are you certain?" _I ask with an annoyed and angry voice._

 _He walks up closer,_ "if we never have a child, it doesn't matter."

 _I blink and look down and close my eyes and hold back the tears, because I failed him. I failed his chances at being a father and I know he is saying he doesn't care if he becomes a father. But I know that is all he ever wanted is to be a father._

"what matters is that we're together."

 _I don't look at him; I just keep my eyes closed and hold back the tears. I open my eyes and look towards him._

"your love means more to me than everything."

 _He really means it; I am completely speechless, he still loves me. But my head is telling me to get over him. He's too stuck up for you. But my heart is saying get up and run to him. I follow my heart and get up with tears in my eyes, and all I can say is_ "William…"

 _With tears in his eyes he begs me_ "please don't go"

 _I approach him with happy tears in my eyes,_ "I won't. I'll tear the ticket up" _I said while looking at the ticket._

"no" _he says_

"no?" _what I am confused._

 _He just stares at me with those gorgeous brown eyes_ "let's buy another one."

 _All I could say is_ "ohh…" _while I grabbed his face and we kissed. Best, most wonderful kiss we ever had with his lips so soft and tender. I thought I would never get to taste or kiss those delicious lips ever again. We let go and looked at each other and smiled, than we hugged. It felt just like when we proposed to each other. I don't know long we hugged for but it was amazing like the world had stopped just for us._

 _I broke the silence,_ "William, you don't even know where we are going."

 _He looks at me_ "like I said, as long as we're together it doesn't matter."

 _I just look at him_ "I love you, William."

"I love you too, Julia and always will"

 _We kissed again and held each other for a few more minutes. We than began packing up William stuff for our what William called it "Our European Adventure."_

The End


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